Towards New You

New York to new you

Reposition Yourself /Re Brand Yourself

Everyone knows what junk is  – the stuff you don’t  want, don’t need, and you’re always planning to clear out or  tidy up.  It may be a pile of letters, old bills, the bulging wardrobe where everything is squashed and unwearable, the desk piled high, the drawers that won’t open. It’s also  the man who  rings on  Tuesday but doesn’t turn up until midnight on Saturday (drunk), the “whining”  friend , the mother who makes you feel guilty like a 12 year old, and that social drinking  that has become an all year party.

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Physical junk and emotional junk are closely linked and the first is often an indicator of the second. You may tell yourself you are a modern person, not a slave  to conventional ideas. You’re careless in your dressing? So what – you are what you are, not what you wear! Your house is in a mess? Of course it is – you have more important things to do than housework. That mess is a message to you – and a sign to the world – that your control is slipping. Your balance has gone and your self – esteem is in need of a good overhaul.

Take Command:

Debunking your life – taking stock of the mess in every area  and at every level – is a healthy  and self – affirming step. Clearing up our physical clutter is an excellent place to start the process. Your physical  environment often reflects and has a direct impact on your mental and emotional state. According to psychologists, from an early age we try to make sense of the world or to make it conform to what we want it to be safe and predictable.

If we can manage   our physical clutter, we are demonstrating to ourselves that we are able to cope, that our lives are manageable and under our control. Very often, just  bringing physical order to our  lives creates feelings of mental  and emotional stability. We show that we are in command, so we behave as if we are.

A life is a mess is a person in a mess and the usual response to that is pity, impatience and even contempt. Ask yourself how people regard you and respond  to you. If you want  respect and cooperation and to be treated as an adult, then don’t let your mess get out of hand. It’s that simple – and it’s that true.

Some of us  like to point to our mess as a  sign of creativity or being special. We even make a virtue of it. See, we seem to say, we’re too wonderful to be bogged down  by simple  efficiency and competence. We’re just kidding ourselves. The people who enter our messy world just see a loser who can’t even manage a desk/ flat/ or back seat of a car…. Good organization  doesn’t  happen naturally. You have to learn how to do it, then put in lots of practice.

Routine Arrangements:

The wrong way to tackle mess is to spend hours cleaning it up, exhausting yourself and  feeling resentful. The trick is routine – once the main mess is under control,  a simple daily and weekly list of chores can keep everything under control. Deliberately limit and set aside clean – up time. When the time is up just stop. The work that was left just had to wait till the next clean – up time.

Everyone finds their own system for dealing with clutter some people invite friends for dinner, forcing themselves to clear up beforehand.

It is no coincidence that mess often starts to pile up during times of personal  difficulty. Those awful periods of self – doubt, or finding yourself at a painful and complex point in your relationship or job, can make you feel that you can’t  cope. Although a good clear out will help, emotional mess needs its own kind of spring cleaning. At times it may be necessary to take a complete audit of your life – your  relationships, career, home life and inner life

Every area can get bogged down with junk of some kind and they all have the same effect as the disorderly kitchen  cupboards – they make us feel depressed and anxious. Emotional cobwebs are just as real as physical ones – de junk your life and you’ll be a different YOU!

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