The average teenager is shy about himself and his appearance. The sudden physical growth and the sometimes ungainly shape makes him feel shy. He does not like to appear in public like on the stage because he is self-conscious and experiences confused feelings. He becomes easily moody and likes to brood and spend time by himself. He may find himself spending long hours before the mirror trying to understand his identity or he may be caught in the attempt to define his hair style. Of course, girls will take longer time before the mirror and ask the proverbial question to the mirror on the wall what it sees. Sometimes certain boys feel worried because their breasts may grow big because of passing hormonal imbalance. They may worry if they are normal or having some sexual identity complications though doctors will assure them it is a passing phase .The occurrence of occasional nocturnal emissions may prompt some boys to think that there is something wrong with them and this may cause them anxiety unless they speak to a knowledgeable adult.
In his book “ Why I am afraid to tell you who I am” John Powell describes well the basic reason why the adolescent feels shy about disclosing his real self. He is afraid that if he reveals his true self he may not be liked, he may be rejected. But he has honestly nothing else to offer. Hence he puts on a façade and pretends to be what he is not. “I am afraid to tell you who I am because you may not like who I am and it’s all that I have to offer you..” But unless the adolescent opens himself up to someone in trust he will remain stunted and not discover his true self. At this moment he needs someone who will accept him as he is without ridiculing him, and shows respect for his individuality, allows him to own his own feelings without judging him.. This is the mellow sunshine in which the adolescent bud will unfold and bloom. A good friend can reassure him he is normal ,and save him from many needless anxieties and worries. The truth is that as God made us we are beautiful and unique individuals . God does not make junk and we should treasure our uniqueness by avoiding blind imitation. This is where the blind hero worship of early teens must give way to healthy assertion of original personalities. From hero worship one must move on to blossom into a fully authentic person functioning in his own right.