How to Deal with Envy

Deal with Envious

Envy is coveting what someone else has to a point well beyond admiration. It’s the feeling you get when the basketball coach suddenly begins to pay more attention to someone else when you’ve been the star player all season. Eliminating envy from your life isn’t always easy, but with effort it can be done.

1. Realize that no one has everything:


Sometimes when you are over -whelmed by feelings of insecurity and low self – esteem it seems as though everyone else “has it made” and if only you were smarter, or richer, of better looking you’d be happy too. But the truth is, nobody has it all.

2. Stop making comparisons:

Concentrate on your own goals, values, and accomplishments, rather than worry about whether other people are ahead of you. The fact that your friend won an award in a guitar competition has no connection with your ambition to enter College. Don’t let envy sidetrack you.

3. Share what you have:

Even if you are convinced that you have little or nothing, there’s always someone who has less. Then volunteer at a nursing home for a jolt of reality. Even in your family circle there’s bound to be someone who would appreciate your time, talents or simple caring. St. Augustine used to say: “If you love, you are not the one who has nothing”.

4. Be fully involved with life:

Envy does visit everyone sooner or later, but it especially loves the idle. Too much time on your hands allows you not only to entertain envy but eventually to become roomates with it! Involve yourself with family, friends, school, community activities, not just to fill time, but because you are vitally interested in and excited about the world around you.

5. Examine you values:

What do you really want out of life? What things are most important for you? Given a choice, most people would want a life of comfort and ease, and existence where beauty, pleasure, and excitement were always close at hand. By delving into your personal values, you learn what’s really significant to you and what isn’t. Also compare your values with those around you. Envy is less common among people who share similar beliefs, and work together towards the same goals.

6. If what you want is worth having, work to get it:

Envy is a time waster. It will neither get you what you want nor make you happy. Suppose you envy a friend who is successful, learn from that friend how to improve you study habits and how to balance extracurricular activities with  classwork. In the process your friend may learn something from you too.

7. Make the most of who you are:

You don’t have to be the brightest, the best – looking, the funniest,  the most  anything to be happy and fulfilled. Since God created you in His  image  and likeness you cannot be valueless! Invest your talents wisely. Use them for your benefit and try to make the world  brighter for others.

8. Don’t let a day pass without thanking God for your blessings:

Modern life has a way of crowding in that you  forget what has been accomplished. Reflect seriously on your blessings. Slam the door on the envy monster, lock it firmly behind you and “go forth in peace”.


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